Konohagakure no Sato: A documentary
by Esah
Summary: A collection of short, interview style interactions with various characters. A few different pairings might come up.


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_Konohagakure no Sato: A documentary. _

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_Uzumaki Naruto._

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Well hi there! I'm Uzumaki Naruto! I suppose you could call me Hokage though, 'cause it's going to happen!

So, this here is a lovely view of Konoha. Isn't it beautiful? I like watching the sun setting, you get the best view from the top of my dad's head. Ah…Hahaha…That is to say, the top of his Hokage statue. Of his head. Yeah alright, zoom out on that thing! _This _is the Hokage monument! This one here, that I'm standing on, is the Fourth Hokage, the Yondaime. He was my dad, though I didn't find out until really recently.

We look alike, huh? Yeaahhh, I'm destined to be Hokage! It runs in the family!

What? Oh. Nah, my mother's surname. Uzumaki. Dad's was Namikaze. Nah, not really, I mean how can I be upset about it, really? He was the Fourth Hokage! Forget being upset, I'm damn proud!

You want to see that? Really? Well it isn't too flashy, I can't afford much. Yeah, not even with that, missions don't pay too much these days, considering that it's been really boring and I've only been getting lower ranking ones. And I have to pay for weapon replacements and food and stuff too. But okay, follow me, I'll show you.

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So, this is it! My apartment. It isn't much, but at least the roof doesn't leak anymore! Actually, I didn't, some friends got sick of me complaining and fixed it for me when I was away. Oh, yeah! They are pretty awesome! Well, it was Kiba and Shikamaru, though Shika didn't really do anything. Yeah, you know how he is. Oh, you don't? Well, you'll see. You're gonna interview him too, yeah? Well yeah, then you'll see.

My kitchen? It's kinda small. Just Ramen, really. Not much though, I usually just go to Ichiraku's.

Are you serious?! You haven't been? Come on! We're going! Follow me!

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This is it! Doesn't it smell amazing? Aaaahhhh…It's the best thing ever to come here and eat after a mission. Sometimes I get half price too! The old man really is good to me!

Oh hey, speaking of! Hey old man! This is some guy doing a documentary on Konoha. He's interviewing us, yeah. I brought him to show the world the best place to eat, ever! Awww, really? Free ramen! Thanks old man!

Aaaahhh, that was awesome! Where do you wanna see next? Oh, wait a second! Sasuke! It's Sasuke! Hey, Saasssuuukkkeeee! Come here! What? Just come here! Stop glaring, it's just a video camera.

This is Uchiha Sasuke! He's the only Uchiha left. Pretty cool, huh? Wave to the camera, Sasuke!

Yeah, should have known you wouldn't.

Anyway, this guy is doing a documentary on Konoha! I guess he came to me first 'cause I'm gonna be the next Hokage! Oh come on, don't smirk at me, bastard! You know it's going to happen! That's my dad! My dad! Look! You know I'm just going to point at it until you look. So what? Just fricken look! Aaarghh!

No, Sasuke, come back! I'm sorry! I didn't even do anything! Holy shit! You arsehole! Get your ass back here, and talk to the camera! Oh my God! Fine! I'm telling Sakura that you're discriminating against me! Fuck you!

Uhh…maybe you should edit that part out…

No, no…the whole thing.

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This leads to the Heroes Memorial. You can usually find a nin or two hanging around there. Usually Kakashi-sensei. Yeah, he goes to visit his old team mate. Every morning. Makes him late as hell whenever we meet up, all the time. He makes up all these lame excuses as to why he's late, but we know the real reason.

It's pretty in there, but I dunno what kind of reaction you'd get if you went in there waving the camera around when people are mourning.

Yeah, I'm philosophical like that. But really, you'd probably just get kicked from here to Suna. Ninja get really freakin angry sometimes, even if we don't show it.

Oh! Hey, hey! You have to come with me! I have the greatest thing ever to show you!

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ISN'T IT AWESOME?! THEY'RE TRAINING REALLY HARD TO DEFEND THE VILLAGE! IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE CLOSED TO VISITORS, BUT I KNOW ALL THE SECRET WAYS TO GET IN EVERYWHERE AROUND HERE!

SORRY ABOUT THE NOISE, IT'S SUPER LOUD, HUH?! OH HOLY SHIT! HE'S BRINGING OUT THE KUNAI! GOD, HE ISN'T VERY GOOD WITH HIS AIM, IS HE?! THEY'RE ONLY GENIN! OH FUCK! HE'S REALLY BAD WITH THE AIMING! SHIT! DUCK! FUCKING GET DOWN!!

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You guys really need some nin in your village! How can you not be used to flying weapons and sparring? Honestly…

Well, I'm sorry about that. I should have known you'd freak out, I mean, most civilians are, around us.

Well anyway, let's go back to the Hokage mountain. The sun should be setting soon, and you'll really enjoy the view!

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Aw hell yeah! Just in time! Look at that.

Really nice, huh.

You know, I get sad sometimes, when I don't get to see this. It's nice seeing all the buildings turn all golden and stuff. Just a while ago, Konoha was a pile of rubble. That fuck head Pein completely obliterated it. Hell, did I deal with that fucker. But that's classified.

Hm? Oh, that'd be Yamato-san. He has this wood jutsu. It was a lot of work for him, though, he restored the entire village in one day! I think he's still off missions for a while. He's a good guy. Nah, not as good as Kakashi-sensei, he'll always be the best! Even if he _is _late all the time. And he always reads those nasty books that Ero-sennin writes.

…

Wrote.

…

Mmm. He passed away not long ago.

No, it's okay. I have all my friends helping me. And as selfish as it was, I avenged his death in a way, I guess.

Oh, by killing the guy who murdered him. Yeah, Pein. I really pitied that guy, though. He seemed kind of mislead.

But not like me! I have a definite goal, and it's to become Hokage! Even if I have to go through hell to get there, I'll damn well get there.

Well anyway, it was great talking to you! I hope I helped you with your project. And that I wasn't too boring, hey! Hahahaha!

You should be able to find a nice place to rest somewhere over there. Yeah, see that big building? Around there somewhere, just ask someone over there for directions.

You're welcome! Have a great night, yeah? Byyyeeee!


End file.
